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Tuesday 2 April 2024

Downstairs

New Month Old Post: first posted 30th October, 2016.

A song for dads to sing to their children. 
Petula Clark: Downtown

What a super singalong on BBC Four on Friday! 

It Started with a Kiss, or rather for us with a bottle of Chilean Shiraz. It was followed by a fabulous edition of Top Of The Pops 1982, from 15th July. After several weeks of watching the constipated faces of Brian Ferry and Martin Fry (get the look!), it was great to have some good tunes for a change. Following Errol and Hot Chocolate came Dexy’s Come On Eileen, the perennial Cliff Richard, David Essex’s Night Clubbing, and Irene Cara’s Fame (although I have never understood the line in that song about qualifying for a pilots licence).

Later, there was a concert with the then (in 2016) 83-year-old Petula Clark who has brought out a new LP. Goodness, she is even more perennial than Cliff Richard. My great-grandfather used to like her and he died in 1960. Her voice is a bit thin now, but the music and band were superb. She kept us waiting for her ultimate singalong song but it duly arrived near the end. I then blotted my copybook by reprising my own lyrics from when the children were little. They went something like this.

When you’re in bed and Mummy’s snoring beside you
You can always go, downstairs
When you are cold and Mummy’s got all the duvet
There’s a place I know, downstairs
You can lie down on the settee, and have it all to yourself, 
Choose some bedtime reading from the books upon the bookshelf
How can you lose?
It’s warmer and quieter there 
You can forget all the snoring, no need to stay there 
Just go downstairs
Sleeping on the settee, downstairs
Sleeping so peacefully, downstairs
Everything’s waiting for you.

When you’re in bed and Mummy’s been eating garlic
There’s a place to go, downstairs
Onions and curry, chilli, tikka masala
Seems to help I know, downstairs
You can open all the windows and the air is clear and nice
Fill your lungs with freshness thats free of herbs and spice
How can you lose?
The night is much cleaner there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares
And go downstairs
Have a weak cup of tea, downstairs
Crackers or toast for me, downstairs
Everything’s waiting for you.

I was lucky not to have to sleep downstairs.  

26 comments:

  1. I assumed Petula had died many years ago. She lives in Geneva, has a holiday chalet in the French Alps and a pad in Chelsea.
    I am very amused by your altered Downtown lyrics.

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    Replies
    1. She's 91. There was another concert on television much more recently - maybe 2023. It was so disappointingly excruciating we had to turn it off.

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  2. Love your rendition. Much better than the original.🤣

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    Replies
    1. She was extremely successful, but I always thought her treatment of the Tony Hatch / Jackie Trent songs too strident. There are much more sensitive versions around.

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  3. Ha-ha! Your alternative version is brilliant! I guess it is the air and the genes that make Yorkshiremen so gifted.

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  4. My late sister hated Petula Clark because people always said she looked like her. She didn't. Not really.

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    1. They must have seen something. I can think of better people to look like.

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  5. Love your alternate lyrics to "Downtown," LOL!

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  6. I will never be able to listen to "Downtown" again without thinking of your alternative lyrics - they are great!

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    1. Errol and Hot Chocolate were quite something, weren't they! But there's nothing wrong with Martin Fry. He went to school with my brother-in-law and apparently was a decent bloke.

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    2. I've just realised the song was not Get The Look but The Look Of Love. But there were quite a lot of lead vocalists at the time who sang with a pained expression on their faces. Ferry and Elvis Costello particularly, but Martin Fry did it too. The band ABC formed in Sheffield, although as you will know, Martin Fry was from Manchester.

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    3. When it comes to pained expressions (and whiney voice), Morrissey tops them all.

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    4. "I wanted a job and then I got a job and heaven knows I'm miserable now."

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  7. Oh my gosh! Those lyrics are terrific.

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    Replies
    1. I must stop making up my own words to songs. It gets me into trouble.

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  8. I saw Petula Clark in concert in 2016, as she promoted that new album. I blogged about it then. She sounded great, considering her age! Love your alternate take on her signature song. :)

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    Replies
    1. I've just looked and read it. It must have been the one shown on TV. I would have gone given the chance. Sorry to spoil the song for you.

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  9. Petula Clark was one of my favorites.

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    1. She was very popular for a long time, with some great songs, although, as I respond above, sometimes a bit too strident to my liking.

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  10. Downtown was recorded by Sinatra who, between lyrics, made
    an odd little noise that may have expressed his distaste for the song.
    (Nelson Riddle persuaded him to record Yesterday after Sinatra
    threw the sheet music of McCartney's song across the studio floor.)
    Remember the excitement that preceded Chaplin's film
    The Duchess of Hong Kong with Sophie Loren & Brando ?
    Chaplin had a walk-on part as a steward on an ocean liner.
    Petula sang the movie's soundtrack : Love This Is My Song.
    Haggerty

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    1. Sinatra singing Downtown must be dreadful, I am not going to look it up. I have never understood his appeal as a singer.

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  11. With lyrics like that I'm surprised that you were not banished to sleep downstairs anyway!

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    Replies
    1. Or even to sleep in the subway. But she couldn't live without my fun.

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